Laura’s dishwasher stopped working, so she called a repairman.
Since she had to go to work the next day, she told the repairman, “I’ll leave the key under the mat. Fix the dishwasher, leave the bill on the counter, and I’ll mail you a check.”
“Oh, by the way, don’t worry about my bulldog, Bob. He won’t bother you. But whatever you do, NEVER talk to my parrot under ANY circumstances! I repeat, don’t talk to my parrot!”
When the repairman arrived at Laura’s apartment the following day, he discovered the biggest, meanest-looking bulldog he had ever seen. But, just as she had said, the dog just lay there on the carpet watching the repairman go about his work.
The parrot, however, drove him crazy all the time with his incessant yelling, cursing, and name-calling. Finally, the repairman couldn’t contain himself any longer and yelled, “Shut up you stupid, ugly bird!”
To which the parrot replied, “Get him, Bob!”
Hope this joke will make you smile! Have a nice day!!
A man and his wife are traveling through the United States
A man and his wife are traveling through the United States when they notice a sign telling them that the town they are entering is called Kissimmee.
They quickly start arguing about how to pronounce it correctly.
“KISS-a-me,” says the husband.
“That’s wrong,” says the wife, “The right way to say it is kis-A-me.”
“Not necessarily,” says the husband, “it could also be kis-a-ME.”
Their argument continues as they drive into town and decide to stop to buy lunch.
After finding a suitable parking space, they head inside to the front counter to order their food.
The husband decides that this is a good opportunity to be proven right and settle the argument with his wife.
“Excuse me,” he says to the waitress at the counter, “My wife and I don’t know how to pronounce the name of this place correctly. Please tell us where we are and say it slowly so that we get it right?”
“Of course,” says the waitress. “Buuurrrgerrrr Kiiinnnnggg.”
LOL!!
Hope this joke will make you smile! Have a nice day!!
