A Blonde on a Train.
The blonde wife came home from her first day commuting into the city.
Her husband noticed she was looking a little peaked and asked, “Honey, are you feeling all right?”
“Not really,” she replied. “I’m nauseated from sitting backward on the train.”
“Poor dear,” he said. “Why didn’t you ask the person sitting across from you to switch seats for a while?”
“I couldn’t,” she replied, “there was no one there.”
A Blonde calls her boyfriend and says,
“Please come over here and help me. I have a jigsaw puzzle, and I can’t figure out how to get started.”
Her boyfriend asks, “What is it supposed to be when it’s finished?”
The blonde says, “According to the picture on the box, it’s a rooster.”
Her boyfriend decides to go over and help with the puzzle. She lets him in and shows him where she has the puzzle spread all over the table. He studies the pieces for a moment, then looks at the box, then turns to her and says,
“First of all, no matter what we do, we’re not going to be able to assemble these pieces into anything resembling a rooster.”
He then takes her hand and says, “Secondly, I want you to relax. Let’s have a nice cup of tea, and then…”he said with a deep sigh …………
“Let’s put all these Corn Flakes back in the box honey.”
One day a blond walks into a doctor’s office with both of her ears burnt.
The doctor asks her what had happened. She says, “Well… when I was ironing my work suit, the phone rang and I mistakenly picked up the iron, instead of the phone.
“Well, that explains one ear, but what about the other?”
“The idiot called again!”
A passenger train is creeping along slowly.
Finally, it creaks to a halt. A passenger sees a conductor walking outside.
‘What’s going on?’ she yells out of the window.
‘Cow on the track!’ replies the conductor.
Ten minutes later, the train resumes its slow pace. Within five minutes, however, it stops again.
The woman sees the same conductor walking outside. She leans out of the window and yells,
‘What happened? Did we catch up with the cow again?’
