Patient 1: ‘Why did you run away from the operation table?’
Patient 2: ‘The nurse was repeatedly saying ‘don’t get nervous’, ‘don’t be afraid’, ‘be strong’, ‘this is a small operation only’, and things like that.’
Patient 1: ‘So what was wrong in that? Why were you so afraid?’
Patient 2: ‘She was talking to the surgeon!’
Four surgeons were taking a coffee break and were discussing their work.
The first said, “I think accountants are the easiest to operate on. You open them up and everything inside is numbered.”
The second said, “I think librarians are the easiest to operate on. You open them up and everything inside is in alphabetical order.”
The third said, “I like to operate on electricians. You open them up and everything inside is color-coded.”
The fourth surgeon said, “I like technicians. They always understand when you have a few parts left over at the end.”
A doctor walks into a room full of patients at a mental institution,
takes out a pen, and draws a door on the wall. He then tells all the patients that whoever wants to escape should use that door.
Immediately, they all rush towards it, but of course cannot go through.
However, one patient sits still at the back with a smile on his face. He has not moved at all.
The doctor thinks he must have been cured. He then asks the patient why he did not rush to the door, and the patient whispers, “They don’t know that I’m the one who has the key.”
Absolute Classic!
Lady patient says to Doctor inside his examination room:
“Doctor can you please call my husband inside, I am not feeling comfortable.”
Doctor: Trust me lady, I am a gentleman.
Lady patient: No Sir, that’s not the issue. Your beautiful receptionist is alone outside and my husband is neither.