A worker approaches his employer and holds up his last wage packet.
“This is two hundred pounds short,” he says.
“I know,” says the employer. “But last week I overpaid you two hundred pounds, and you didn’t say anything.”
“Well,” says the worker. “I don’t mind an occasional mistake. But when it gets to be a habit, I feel I have to call it to your attention.”
Jones came into the office an hour late for the third time in one week and found the boss waiting for him.
“What’s the story this time, Jones?” he asked sarcastically. “Let’s hear a good excuse for a change.”
Jones sighed, “Everything went wrong this morning, boss. My wife decided to drive me to the station. She got ready in ten minutes, but then the drawbridge got stuck. Rather than let you down, I swam across the river – look, my suit’s still damp – ran out to the airport, got a ride on Mr Thompson’s helicopter, landed on top of Radio City Music Hall, and was carried here piggyback by one of the Rockettes.”
“You’ll have to do better than that, Jones,” said the boss, obviously disappointed. “No woman can get ready in ten minutes.”
A new business was opening and one of the owner’s friends wanted to send him flowers for the occasion.
They arrived at the new business site and the owner read the card, which said: “Rest in Peace.” The owner was angry and called the florist to complain.
After he had told the florist of the obvious mistake and how angry he was, the florist replied: “Sir, I’m really sorry for the mistake, but rather than getting angry, you should imagine this – somewhere, there is a funeral taking place today, and they have flowers with a note saying:
“Congratulations on your new location!”
The teacher was giving her class of seven-year-olds a nature history lesson.
“Worker ants,” she told them, “can carry pieces of food five times their own weight. What do you conclude from that?”
One child was ready with the answer, “They don’t have a union?”
An ant knocked on the door of a house.
The lady house owner opened the door.
“I want a place to stay” – said the ant.
“I have a vacant room which you can occupy for free of cost” – said the owner.
The ant went inside and occupied the vacant room. After some days, the ant brought in another ant and requested the owner: “Can you please allow this ant to stay with me?”
“Oh sure, you can do so without paying any rent” – said the owner.
After some days the ant brought a 3rd ant and requested the owner to allow it to stay with them. The lady agreed to it without asking for any rent. This went on as the ant brought in more & more ants and the owner agreed to let them stay without any rent. One fine day, the ant brought in the 10th ant and requested the owner to allow it to stay with them all.
The owner said: “OK, you can all stay here, but now you all need to pay rent!”
Now the question is: “Why did the owner ask for rent when the 10th ant came in?”
Because they were now tenants!
