Working in an ophthalmology practice that specializes in LASIK surgery,
the doctor expected to comfort nervous patients. But prior to one operation, the patient was so nervous she was actually shaking.
Nothing the doctor said to her would comfort her so after the doctor finished on the first eye and before he began on the second he wanted her to know the surgery was going well.
There, he said, patting her hand reassuringly, “Now you only have one eye left.”
There are two buddies, one with a Doberman Pinscher and the other with a Chihuahua.
The guy with the Doberman Pinscher says to his friend, “Let’s go over to that restaurant and get something to eat.”
The guy with the Chihuahua says, “We can’t go in there. We’ve got dogs with us.”
The buddy with the Doberman Pinscher says, “Just follow my lead.”
They walk over to the restaurant, and the guy with the Doberman Pinscher puts on a pair of dark glasses and starts to walk in.
The bouncer at the door says, “Sorry, mac, no pets allowed!”
The man with the Doberman Pinscher says, “You don’t understand. This is my seeing-eye-dog.”
The bouncer says, “A Doberman Pinscher?”
He answers, “Yes, they’re using them now; they’re very good and protect me from robbers, too.”
The man at the door says, “Come on in.”
The buddy with the Chihuahua figures, “What the heck!” He puts on a pair of dark glasses and starts to walk in.
Once again the bouncer says, “Sorry, pal, no pets allowed!”
The guy with the Chihuahua says, “You don’t understand. This is my seeing-eye dog.”
The bouncer at the door says, “A Chihuahua?”
The man with the Chihuahua says, “A Chihuahua? They gave me a Chihuahua?”
Four surgeons were taking a coffee break and were discussing their work.
The first said, “I think accountants are the easiest to operate on. You open them up and everything inside is numbered.”
The second said, “I think librarians are the easiest to operate on. You open them up and everything inside is in alphabetical order.”
The third said, “I like to operate on electricians. You open them up and everything inside is color-coded.”
The fourth surgeon said, “I like technicians. They always understand when you have a few parts left over at the end.”
