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Two storks are sitting in their nest

Two storks are sitting in their nest: a father stork and baby stork.

The baby stork is crying and crying and father stork is trying to calm him. “Don’t worry, son. Your mother will come back. She’s only bringing people babies and making them happy.”

The next night, it’s father’s turn to do the job. Mother and son are sitting in the nest, the baby stork is crying, and mother is saying “Son, your father will be back as soon as possible, but now he’s bringing joy to new mommies and daddies.”

A few days later, the stork’s parents are desperate: their son is absent from the nest all night! Shortly before dawn, he returns and the parents ask him where he’s been all night.

The baby stork says, “Nowhere. Just scaring the hell out of college students!”

A college student writes to his parents…

“Dear mom and dad,

“I feel miserable because I have to keep writing for money. I feel ashamed and unhappy. I have to ask for another hundred, but every cell in my body rebels. I beg on bended knee that you forgive me.

“Your son,

Marvin.

“P.S. I felt so terrible, I ran after the mailman who picked this up in the box at the corner. I wanted to take this letter and burn it. I prayed that I could get it back. But it was too late.”

A few days later he received a letter from his father. It said,

“Your prayers were answered. Your letter never arrived!”

A new manager spends a week at his new office with the manager he is replacing.

On the last day the departing manager tells him, “I have left three numbered envelopes in the desk drawer. Open an envelope if you encounter a crisis you can’t solve.”

Three months down the track there is major drama, everything goes wrong – the usual stuff – and the manager feels very threatened by it all.

He remembers the parting words of his predecessor and opens the first envelope. The message inside says “Blame your predecessor!”

He does this and gets off the hook.

About half a year later, the company is experiencing a dip in sales, combined with serious product problems.

The manager quickly opens the second envelope. The message read, “Reorganize!”

This he does, and the company quickly rebounds.

Three months later, at his next crisis, he opens the third envelope.

The message inside says “Prepare three envelopes…”

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