A lady walks into a fancy jewelry store.
She browses around, spots a beautiful diamond bracelet, and walks over to inspect it.
When she bends over to look more closely, she accidentally breaks the wind.
Very embarrassed, she looks around nervously to see if anyone has noticed her little accident and prays that a salesperson doesn’t pop up right now.
When she turns around, her worst nightmare materializes in the form of a salesman standing right behind her.
Cool as a cucumber and with complete professionalism, the salesman of the fancy jewelry store greets the lady with, “Good Morning, Madam. How may we help you today?”
Very uncomfortably, but in the hope that the salesman may not have been there at the time of her little “accident”! She asks, “Sir, what is the price of this beautiful bracelet?”
He replies, “Ma’am if you farted just looking at it, you’re going to crap when I tell you the price.”
Hope this joke will make you smile! Have a nice day!
Widow and $30,000 Funeral
Jack passed away. His will provided $30,000 for an elaborate funeral.
When the last guests left the funeral, his wife, Helen turned to her oldest friend. “Well, I’m sure Jack would be happy,” she said.
“I’m sure you’re right,” Jody replied, lowering her voice and leaned in close.
“How much did this really cost?”
“Everything,” said Helen. “Thirty thousand.”
“No!” Jody exclaimed. “I mean it was very nice, but $30,000?”
Helen replied. “The funeral cost $6,500. I donated $500 to the church. The wake, food, and drinks were another $500. The rest went for the memorial stone.”
Jody did the math quickly. “$22,500 for a memorial stone? My God, how big is it?!”
“Two and a half carats.”
Hope this joke will make you smile! Have a nice day!!