A man’s printer started printing more and more faintly, so he called a local repair shop.

A friendly young man informed him, “Well, you could bring it in for a cleaning, but we charge $50 for that, so you might be better off just reading the manual and trying the job yourself.”

Pleasantly surprised by this candor, the man said, “Thanks, son. Does your boss know that you discourage business?”

“Actually, it was my boss’s idea,” said the young employee. “He says that if we let people try to fix things themselves first, we end up making even more money!”

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A woman had a problem with her closet door—it fell every time a bus passed, so she called a repair man.

The repairman comes and sees that indeed, the door falls out whenever a bus passes by.

“OK, I’m going to see what’s going on. Just close the door behind me,” he says as he steps into the closet.

At that time the husband comes home from work, opens the closet, and finds the repairman.

Husband: “What the hell are you doing here!”

Repairman: “Well, you are not going to believe it, but I am waiting for a bus!”

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While having their evening dinner together,

a little girl looked up at her father and asked,

“Daddy, you’re the boss in our family, right?”

The father was very pleased to hear it and confidently replied, “Yes my little princess.”

The girl then continued, “That’s because mommy put you in charge, right?”

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An optometrist was instructing a new employee on how to charge a customer…

“As you are fitting his glasses, if he asks how much they cost, you say ‘$75.”

“If his eyes don’t flutter, say, For the frames. The lenses will be $50.”

“If his eyes still don’t flutter, you add …’Each.”

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Customers are so innocent!

Customer: “I’ve been ringing 0700-2300 for two days and can’t get through to enquiries; can you help?”

Operator: “Where did you get the number from, sir?”

Customer: “It was on the door to the Travel Centre”.

Operator: “Sir, they are our opening and closing hours.”