Jim is at a New Year’s party when he turns to his friend, Brian, and asks for a cigarette.
Brian says to him, “I thought you’d made a New Year’s resolution to quit smoking?”
Jim replies, “I’m in the process of quitting. Right now, I’m in the middle of phase one.”
“Phase one?” asks Brian
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“Yeah,” laughs Jim. “I’ve quit buying.”
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A blind man walks into a bar
A blind man walks into a bar, grabs his dog by its hind legs, and swung him around in a circle.
The bartender says, “Hey buddy, what are you doing?”
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And the blind man says, “Don’t mind me, I’m just looking around.”
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