A little girl tried not to be late for Bible class.
She ran as fast as she could.
As she ran she prayed, “Dear Lord, please don’t let me be late! Dear Lord, please don’t let me be late!”
While she was running and praying, she tripped on a curb and fell, getting her clothes dirty and tearing her dress.
She got up, brushed herself off, and started running again.
As she ran she once again began to pray, “Dear Lord, please don’t let me be late…
…
..
.
But!–please don’t shove me either!”
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An elephant and a turtle.
An elephant was drinking at a watering hole when a turtle approached.
The elephant looked at the turtle for a minute and then gave it a swift kick. The turtle flew through the air and landed several hundred feet away.
A zebra standing close by asking, “Why did you kick that turtle?”
“Well,” the elephant replied, “That turtle was the one that bit me almost fifty years ago.”
“And you remembered him after all these years? Boy, you sure do have a good memory.”
The elephant looked at the zebra for a minute and said,
.
.
.
.
“I have turtle recall.”