The In-laws Ministry
A mother-in-law explaining work to her newly wed Daughter-in-law.
“I am Home Minister as well as Finance Minister of this house, your Father-in-law is the Foreign Minister, my Son, I mean your husband runs the Ministry of Demand and Supply, and, my daughter runs Planning & Development Ministry. Now you tell me which Ministry would you like to run?”
Daughter-in-law instantly replied with a smile, “Dear mother-in-law, I’ll be the leader of OPPOSITION…”
A man was in a bar with his buddies, recounting the events of the previous week.
It was payday the previous Friday, so he had decided to stay out with his friends for a spot of drinking.
An evening out turned into a whole weekend of partying, and he only returned home on Sunday night, to bear his wife’s inevitable wrath.
“My wife wasn’t too pleased that I didn’t show up for a whole weekend,” he said.
“What did she say to you?” asked his buddies.
“Well, she just nagged for what seemed like an eternity, then at one point, she asked me how I’d like it if I didn’t see her for two or three days,” he replied.
“And what did you say?” they asked.
“I told her it would be fine by me!”
“So did she leave?”
“Well no, she didn’t leave, but the joke’s on her. On the third day, my left eye opened up a little bit.”
A man is at work one day when he notices that his co-worker is wearing an earring.
This man knows his co-worker to be a normally conservative fellow, and is curious about his sudden change in “fashion sense.”
The man walks up to him and says, “I didn’t know you were into earrings.”
“Don’t make such a big deal out of this, it’s only an earring,” he replies sheepishly.
His friend falls silent for a few minutes, but then his curiosity prods him to say: “So, how long have you been wearing one?”
“Ever since my wife found it in my truck.”
A new bride was a bit embarrassed to be known as a honeymooner.
So when she and her husband pulled up to the hotel, she asked him,
“If there was any way that they could make it appear that they had been married a long time.”
He responded, “Sure. You carry the suitcases!”
A 60-year-old millionaire was getting married and threw a big wedding reception.
The big day arrived, and he got married to his stunning 23-year-old bride in the vast garden of his 50,000-square-foot mansion.
Champagne was flowing and an enormous team of waiters was flitting about serving the finest hors-d’oeuvres in the land.
Naturally, the millionaire’s less wealthy friends couldn’t help but feel jealous.
In a quiet moment, one of them asked him how he landed such a young beauty.
“Simple,” grinned the millionaire, “I faked my age.”
His friends were really amazed and asked him how old he said he was.
“87!” he replied.
