A rookie police officer was out for his first ride in a cruiser with an experienced partner.
A call came in telling them to disperse some people who were loitering.
The officers drove to the street and observed a small crowd standing on a corner.
The rookie rolled down his window and said, “Let’s get off the corner, people!”
A few glances, but no one moved, so he shouted again, “Let’s get off that corner… Now!” Intimidated, the group of people began to leave, casting puzzled stares in his direction.
Proud of his first official act, the young policeman turned to his partner and asked, “Well, how did I do?”
“Pretty good,” chuckled the verteran policemen, “especially since this is a bus stop!”
A woman got a problem with her closet door – it was felling every time a bus was passing by. So she called a repair man.
The repairman comes and sees that indeed, the door falls out every time when a bus passes by.
“OK, I am gonna see what is going on, just close the door behind me” and he stepps into the closet.
At that time the husband comes from work, opens the closet and finds the repairman.
Husband: “What the hell are you doing here!”
Repairman: “Well, you are not going to believe it, but I am waiting for a bus!”
An usher at a movie theatre notices a customer lying across three seats near the back of the theatre.
He tells the customer that he can only take up one seat. The customer just moans and rolls his eyes.
The usher goes to get his supervisor who also tells the customer he must only take one seat or he will call the police. Once again the customer just moans and rolls his eyes.
The supervisor calls the police, who come and tell the customer that he can only take up one seat. “What’s wrong with you?” they ask. The customer just moans and rolls his eyes.
The police officer asks the man, “Where did you come from?”
The man lifts a hand in the air, and says, “The balcony.”
“What happened?” asked the hospital visitor to the heavily bandaged man sitting up in bed.
“Well, I went down to Margate at the weekend and decided to take a ride on the roller coaster. As we came up to the top of the highest loop, I noticed a little sign by the side of the track. I tried to read it but it was very small and I couldn’t make it out.
“I was so curious that I decided to go round again, but we went by so quickly that I couldn’t see what the sign said.
“By now, I was determined to read that sign so I went round a third time. As we reached the top, I stood up in the car to get a better view.”
“And did you manage to see what the sign said this time?” asked the visitor.
“Yes.”
“What did it say?”
“Don’t stand up in the car!”
