General McKenzie was in charge of the Navy, and he was visiting his colleague General Marshall, who was in charge of the Army.
McKenzie arrives at the military camp and is greeted by Marshall. They both walk around the place, and McKenzie asks: ‘So how are your men?’ ‘Very well-trained, Gen McKenzie!’
‘I hope so. My men over at the Navy are so well-trained that they’re the bravest of men in the whole country.’ ‘Well, my men are very brave, too.’ ‘I’d like to see that.’
So Marshall calls Private Cooper and says: ‘Private Johnson! I want you to stop that tank coming here with your body!’ ‘Are you crazy? I’m out of here!’
As Private Johnson ran away, Marshall turned to a bewildered McKenzie and said: ‘You see? You have to be pretty brave to talk like that to a general.’
During a simulated attack, the troops have to defend themselves against an imaginary enemy, as the sergeant calls it.
Bawling out orders, he notices that one recruit shows little response.
“You there,” the sergeant shouts, “the imaginary enemy is advancing, and you are caught in the crossfire. Action!”
The recruit takes ten steps to one side.
“What are you doing, man?” yells the sergeant, purple with fury.
“I’m taking shelter behind an imaginary hill,” answers the recruit calmly.
A new general was allotted to a new army base.
After some time in the base he realized how there were two army men guarding an empty bench in shifts. He asked his colleagues and his juniors what it was all about.
A colleague said “I don’t know but it’s been a tradition here since joined 35 years ago.”
The general confused as he was went through the past generals of that base till he found the one that was in charge 35 years ago.
He attempted to find him, and found that he had retired and he lived in the countryside now. He contacted him and requested to meet.
On the day of the meeting the general asked the retired commander why that bench was guarded so much. The commander was shocked.
“So you’re telling me the paint on that bench hasn’t dried yet?!”
