Writing a horror screenplay.
It starts off with a ringing phone.
The person answers and it’s their mom saying, “I have a computer question.”
I was out walking with my 4 year old daughter.
She picked up something off the ground and started to put it in her mouth. I took the item away from her and I asked her not to do that.
“Why?” my daughter asked.
“Because it’s been on the ground, you don’t know where it’s been, it’s dirty, and probably has germs” I replied.
At this point, my daughter looked at me with total admiration and asked, “Mommy, how do you know all this stuff, you are so smart.”
I was thinking quickly. “All moms know this stuff. It’s on the Mommy Test. You have to know it, or they don’t let you be a Mommy.”
We walked along in silence for 2 or 3 minutes, but she was evidently pondering this new information.
”OH…I get it!” she beamed, “So if you don’t pass the test you have to be the daddy.”
“Exactly” I replied back with a big smile on my face.
The father is telling his son stories to help him sleep.
The only sound is the murmur of dad’s voice. Two hours pass, and there’s silence in the room.
The mother creeps to the door and whispers, “Is he asleep, dear?”
“Yes, Mommy,” says her son.
One day a little girl was sitting and watching her mother do the dishes at the kitchen sink.
She suddenly noticed that her mother had several strands of white hair sticking out in contrast on her brunette head.
She looked at her mother and inquisitively asked, “Why are some of your hairs white, Mom?”
Her mother replied, “Well, every time that you do something wrong and make me cry or unhappy, one of my hairs turns white.”
The little girl thought about this revelation for a while and then said, “Momma, how come ALL of grandma’s hairs are white?”